10:14am

Puffy eyes
Dry throat
Heart ache
No sleep

Can't

Believe how much my birthday has sucked. This is the worst birthday i've ever had. I had to work 8 hours, the one person that means sooooooo much to me is out hanging with his friends, I guess that's more important though. Taylor and Jessica are the only two of my friends who actually got me something and did something for me. My parents try, but i'm always disapointed.

My 18th Birthday

sucked.

Seriously

I'm so confused about people. I'm tired, fucking tired of the slack people in my life. All I ask for is to be respected. My parents criticize me about anything and everything. I think i'm a good person. I honor my parents wishes by not smoking, not drinking, not whoring around, finishing high school and going to college, but yet it's still not good enough. I don't even know who my real "friends" are. They will always stab you in the back and talk bad about you. That's not the definition of a friend. I give my all to some people and all I want is to feel appreciated and wanted. People take for granted what they have every damn day. I just wish people would stop and look at all the great I do for them instead of pick out the few negatives. Not trying to throw a pitty party for myself, i'm just getting this across clear, that I will not be nice, meak and understanding of things anymore. Michelle comes first now. I don't care about anyone, anymore.

I

am so artistic and indie rock because I go to the academy for arts and science ;)

I Seriously

feel like I have no friends. I could really care less if I did or not because I have the few people that mean the most to me in my life daily. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh well. I'm done trying to be nice to people. I'm done trying to hang out with people. I'm done talking to everyone.

Laterrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Lame

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

17

and i'm so much more mature than the people I live around. Not saying i'm better than anyone whatsoever but i'm just really glad I have my life planned out and i'm not just wasting it on stupid shit.

I miss High School already

I'm only pretty sure that I can't take anymore
Before you take a swing
I wonder
What are we fighting for
When I say out loud
I want to get out of this
I wonder
Is there anything I'm going to miss
I wonder How it's going to be
When you don't know me
How's it going to be
When you're sure I'm not there
How's it going to be
When there is no one to talk to, between you and me
'Cause I don't care
How's it going to be
How's it going to be
Where we used to laugh
There's a shouting match
Sharp as a thumbnail scratch
A silence I can't ignore
Like...
The hammocks by the doorway we spent time in
Swings empty, don't see lightning like last fall when it was always
about to hit
me
I wonder how's it going to be when it goes down
Hows it going to be
When your not around
Hows it going to be
When you found out there was nothing
Between you and me
'Cause I don't care
How's it going to be.
Hows it going to be
When you don't know me any more
And how's it going to be
Want to get myself back in again
The soft dive of oblivian
Wanna taste the soul of your skin
The soft dive of oblivian
Oblivian
How's it going to be
When you don't know me any more
How's it going to be
How's it going to be

Graduation

Was amazing. I cried like a baby along with my fellow classmates. I'm going to miss everyone so damn much, I can't believe it's over.

June 5th, 2009

My heart is jumping out of my chest.

Today is the day that I graduate high school and start my future into the "real world".
I'm so happy but sad at the same time. School went by so fast, I now know what people mean by "you're going to miss high school". I'm going to miss my friends that I've grew up with and my teachers, yes teachers. There are just so many emotions right now it's unreal. I don't think i've ever really felt like this about anything, happy,sad,nervous,scared,excited. I'm just so glad I finally made it. All the doubts and wrong-doings are vanished. I guess this gives me an excuse to make a corny "Graduation" CD, haha. It's now 8:02am and I will be at graduation rehearsal a 9:00am. Tonight actual graduation is at 7:00pm. I expect it will be exactly how i've imagined it.